How to Make Your Wedding Guest List
The dreaded wedding guest list. Or as I like to call it The Best Way To Go Over Your Wedding Budget and Fight With Your Parents.
In all seriousness though, the guest list is probably the most stressful part of the entire wedding planning process, so save these tips to save your wallet, your sanity, and your relationships.
Pick a venue with a small guest capacity
If your venue is limiting you on how many guests you can even invite, then that’s a win, wouldn’t you say?
“Sorry Cousin Ben who I haven’t seen since I was 7, I can only invite 75 people because my venue limits me” is a lot nicer than saying “Who the fuck even are you? It’s been 20 years since we last played in the sand box together”
For example, our venue placed a 15 guest capacity for our weekday micro-wedding for the price we paid. That made it REAL easy to let friends and family know why they weren’t invited. Micro-wedding fans should check out this small event rental space in Calgary. Look at these Scottsdale wedding venues to find one that will accommodate all of your guests, regardless of the length of your guest list.
Have an Adults Only wedding
Yes. Kids are cute. But I can promise you two things:
1 – their parents want a night off to party freely
2 – they’ll fall asleep right after they eat the cake which means their parents have to dip out early
And if your friends/family can’t come (or refuse to, which is gross of them) because you aren’t allowing kids, then they just did your job for you.
Tip: Include the parents names only on the response card so there’s no confusion.
Use a Category system
-Immediate Family
-Extended Family
-Friends
From there, think about if you’ve spoken to them in the last 2 years, if you see yourself still talking to them in 5 years, who are your mutual friends, etc.
Now ask yourself these questions:
Can you imagine getting married without them there?
How often do you see or speak to them?
Have they been supportive of your relationship?
Are they going to judge you in any capacity?
Do you feel pressured into inviting them?
Prioritize
Now that you’ve listed out the important people, you need to categorize and prioritize. Give each guest one of these letters:
A List – Close family & friends that you absolutely MUST have
B List – Additional friends, extended family members & co-workers you want to celebrate with
C List – Friends and family that it would be nice to share the day with if your budget allows it
And my favorite one…
D List – these are the people who would make you sad on your wedding day. The Debbie Downers’s if you will. If they don’t pass the Vibe Check, they don’t get an Invite.
The Parent’s List
While I’m on team If They Give You Money, It’s A Gift… talk to your partner about how many guests each of your parents can invite. Parents who help pay should get priority though.
Get rid of the +1 option
My bestie referred to it as “No Ring, No Bring” so if the person isn’t engaged or married, they need to leave their special someone at home. ESPECIALLY if you’ve never met them before.
Tip: this is more of a warning I guess. When you don’t allow people to bring their partner, don’t expect them to be up on that dance floor. It could look a little empty.
Be Realistic About Your Budget
Want to know why weddings are so damn expensive?
It’s the guest count.
A bigger guest count means a larger venue, more table and chair rentals, lots food, extra servers to serve the food, more booze, more sales tax…see where I’m going with this?
So be realistic about your budget. I think the average cost per guest at a wedding in the US is something like $150. In some States its over $200.
Let’s do some of my least favorite subject to really drive the point home – Math!
$150 x 200 wedding guests = $30,000 (and you don’t even have your dress or suit yet…)
$150 x 50 wedding guests = $7,500
So you see, keep it small, friends! A larger wedding isn’t always the dream. Slash your guest list, save your cash, and go on a bomb ass honeymoon or put a down-payment on a house! Plus, expect to have some amazing 結婚禮物.
Katie + Jay of Catherine Ann Photography are Charleston SC Based Wedding & Elopement Photographers specializing in candid & fun wedding photos that feel like you!
Ready to book your wedding with us? Get in touch here!
