Tips for Family Photos on Your Wedding Day

I think I need to start a Keepin’ Shit Real series because I read too many wedding planning articles that sugar coat how a wedding day goes. I’m not saying it won’t be an incredible day, but things happen and I think being prepared for those things is much better than pretending it couldn’t happen.

Family photos are some of the most treasured wedding photos that increase in value as time goes on. I can’t tell you how often we get emails from couples about how the candids and family photos are their favorite images and how much it means to them!

And when a family member passes away & these were the last photos taken with them? Phew. Those emails always make me cry.

We love our families. And I know you love yours too! But they are (not “can be”…they are) the biggest source of stress for a couple on the wedding day, I’ve seen it over and over.

Can’t ask this aunt to be in a photo without pissing off THIS aunt, but you’re not as close to them. Uncle Jim and Cousin Bob have a strained relationship so they cant stand next to each other for too long. This family wants a picture with the couple, and now this family wants one too, and now this family. Dad wants his entire extended side of the family photo taken (“All the Johnsons, if your last name is or was Johnson we need you for a photo! Wheres Jamie? Oh she ran off to cocktail hour? Ok lets send 4 people to find her!”).

Its stressful. And you don’t know it’s stressful because your wedding hasn’t happened yet so you haven’t lived it. I encourage you to ask your recently married friends & family about their experiences.

So, here are some tips to help make these super important family photos a little less stressful and help them go by faster, because I’ve been photographing weddings for 13 years and I know my shit (-;

At the end of this blog post is a sample family photo list for you to save & that I use as a base for all of our couples & a bonus tip!

1. Send everyone the list before the wedding day

First of all, I ALWAYS make a family photo list for you before the big day. You approve or make changes to it, and THAT list is what I go off of the day of the wedding, in the exact order I make it.

Second, people want to be told what to do, so by sending them the wedding day timeline & family list that I make for you, it lets them know where they need to be and when and for what photos!

If you have a first look, we schedule immediate family photos to be done before the ceremony, but sometimes the grandparents are not made aware that family photos are being done before the ceremony and so they don’t come early. So let your nuclear family members know when they’re needed – and this includes your siblings spouses & kids!

If you DON’T do a first look, we still want to get as much completed before the ceremony as possible but this means doing family photos twice: individuals (You + Mom, etc) before the ceremony and everyone together after the ceremony (You + Your Partner + Your Family, etc.) so you have to let your families know that just because we did some photos pre-ceremony they will still be needed afterwards for more.

I’ve seen siblings and parents walk away to cocktail hour and get angry that they’ve been pulled away for more photos. So set those expectations early by sharing the list & timeline!

2.Keep it simple: too many people = chaos

The more people you add to the mix, the more chaotic anything becomes. The same goes for family formals. We totally understand that weddings are a huge deal and bring families together but doing huge extended family photos takes a very long time and it’s never just one.

Each group of requested photos can take anywhere from 5 minutes to 10 minutes to orchestrate. That is a lot of time!

The reception is a wonderful time to get everyone together and shoot extended family (the DJ or Band can announce who we need for photos).

Pretty much think of it this way: If you dont think you’ll print the photo or put it in an album, it doesn’t need to be done with natural light. We do extended family & friends photos at the reception all the time and it’s a win all around – the extended family gets a photo with the newlyweds and the couple isn’t stressed!

3. Group family photos without your new spouse is weird

We always take individual photos of you & your families like You + Mom, You + Dad, etc. But to do an entire family photo (You + parents + siblings + grandparents) without your new spouse is a little…strange. Who’s gonna hang up this wedding picture in their home without both of the newlyweds in it?

Just something to think about.

4. Tell them to remain seated after the ceremony so they don’t leave for cocktail hour

Very rarely do we get a request to do all family photos after the ceremony if a first look happens, but if you don’t plan on doing a first look then we will need you to ask your families to remain seated after the ceremony (so long as they are not supposed to be precessing back down the aisle) because we’ve absolutely run into the big issue of someone’s brother getting on the bus to head to cocktail hour but they were supposed to stay behind at the church for family photos…sooo guess who wasn’t in those pictures…